A CONTROVERSIAL parent has made waves across the internet for insisting she NEVER punishes her children – in case it’s disrespectful to them!
After watching a video by relationship coach and parenting Tiktokker AlyPain on the topic, “momma mentor” Rachael agreed with every word – not only does she see it as acceptable to scream, but sometimes she even joins in.
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The video revealed that even if your child or teenager makes poor choices, breaks boundaries and steps totally out of line, punishment is the wrong move – as it “creates suffering”.
“If your kid complies with whatever punishment you have set out,” it continued, “I can promise you they’re only doing it so they can get back whatever privileges you have removed, not because they plan on changing their behaviour – they’re way too p***ed at you!”
Naturally this extreme parenting hack proved controversial, with some viewers wondering exactly how far this would allow their wayward children to go.
Yet the advice was clear – punishment “does not include respect” and “comes from a place of needing control or power over someone”.
Even worse, the relationship coach continued, it could lead to a child feeling “humiliated and shamed”.
As a reaction, Rachael resolved, “If I sense they need to work out frustration and vent a bit…. we’ll run around screaming – that helps them exert that energy.”
Incredulous comments in reply included, “I don’t think we should completely do away with punishment” and “please don’t have kids.”
Yet Rachael was convinced that even if a teenager screamed and got angry , then punishment would not be the answer – and would only cause further “frustration”.
She then produced a subsequent video of her own, quoting from the BIBLE to explain why children should not be “provoked” in the first place – and that if they were, it could be the parent’s fault.
“Do not provoke your children to anger,” she states “[and] do not exasperate them to the point of resentment with demands that are… humiliating!”
“A child’s prefrontal cortex isn’t fully developed until they reach their mid 20s,” she justifies in another video in reply to comments that “screaming is unacceptable”.
“[By punishing them], you’re shutting down a child’s feelings and needs and telling them you don’t care… that is the message their brain is receiving.”
One parent who tried the approach reported back that her child simply started “hitting out and throwing things”.
Ever-patient Rachael suggested, “Block their hands. [Tell them] ‘I’m happy to hold you as long as you keep my body safe.'”
The approach is highly controversial for more traditional parents, who believe that discipline is a vital way to get a child ready for adult life.
Is this a genius parenting hack or a recipe for total disaster?
The debate is on.
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Meanwhile, a mother’s parenting skills are savagely criticised in this note from a neighbour.
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Plus here are some dangerous parenting hacks mums are urged to avoid.