Man defends decision to ask new mum to move seats while breastfeeding in cafe

He thought it was inappropriate for her to breastfeed while sitting at the same table, but many pointed out that his “ignorant” decision was hurtful to her new mum

As any parent knows, when your baby wants to be fed, it has to happen, no matter where you are.

For mum’s trying to get out and about, if they’re breastfeeding, this means it has to be done in public – and that’s totally fine.

For anyone who thinks otherwise, you wouldn’t insist an adult leave a social setting to eat elsewhere, so why does breastfeeding mum’s still get hassled?

While things have improved greatly, too many nursing mums’ still face unnecessary hassle, and there’s still a way to go.

Take one man, for example, who recently suggested to a fellow cafe-goer that she feed her baby elsewhere, as he felt uncomfortable.

Luckily, having got some strongly worded feedback on Reddit, he probably sees the error of his ways now.

The 27-year-old headed down to a local cafe for lunch, which is pretty small and often busy when a woman with a baby asked if she could take the seat across his table.

He wrote: “So a little bit goes by and her baby starts crying, so she takes a breast out and starts breastfeeding.

“Obviously I’m just avoiding all eye contact but it got so uncomfortable that I ended up asking if she might be able to see if she can sit at the other table.

“I’m just trying to sit here, drink this cup of coffee, finish reading in my portfolio and leave.

“The woman looked sorry and really just said she couldn’t and the baby was already eating (feeding?, I don’t know) so I just downed the coffee, and started to lea

“A few people looked at me like I was a douche and it’s been bothering me.

“I know it’s a natural thing for babies and mum’s and that there’s nothing I can do. I wasn’t going to try and force her away so I left.

“Was it too far to ask if she may have sat at the other table. I don’t know, I feel like I was an a**hole thinking about it now. But I just didn’t know what to say when a random woman is breastfeeding three feet away.”

The responses were unanimous – he’d been out of order, as backed up by the NHS advice on breastfeeding.

It states: “You should not ever be made to feel uncomfortable about breastfeeding in public. It is illegal for anyone to ask a breastfeeding woman to leave a public place, such as a cafe, shop or public transport.”

One person wrote: “This woman probably got two hours of sleep last night, has a crushingly awful mix of hormones in her body, she tried to escape and do ONE adult thing for herself, only to have to feed her crying baby and then you give her a hard time?

“I get that not everyone grows up comfortable around bodies and nudity but bro. Breastfeeding is 0% sexual. And if it really bothered you, you should’ve moved to the less desirable spot.

“Everyone was looking at you weirdly because you’re the a**hole. Please do better next time – she deserves empathy, which was decidedly not what you gave her.”

Another added: ” If you’re uncomfortable, you move. You don’t get to ask someone else to move. That’s not how anything works.”

Leave a Comment